• Sex-Ed Steph

Satisfaction is NOT Guaranteed

Consider this when shopping for a new sex toy

Photo by Yohann LIBOT on Unsplash

When it comes to shopping for sex toys, one thing that occasionally people don’t realize is that your satisfaction is not guaranteed. Sometimes people go for something flashy and popular, only for the toy not to be right for them. You can spend hundreds of dollars on a sex toy and still be disappointed. I learned this lesson as a customer, and I saw it countless times as a sex toy salesperson.

When you’re buying a new sex toy, you need to consider what type of stimulation you prefer. That’s always my first question for customers looking for a new toy. There’s nothing wrong with not knowing what kind of stimulation you would like because if you allow yourself to explore, every toy becomes a part of your sexual journey.

For example, my first vibrator was a cheap 7’ jelly battery operated rabbit from Adam and Eve. I was so excited to get a vibrator, I figured any would do. Oops. I did not and still don’t masturbate through penetration and suddenly I had a 7’ toy. I ended up just leaning the rabbit part onto my clit. Battery operated toys tend to not be as strong and that was a quick disappointment as well. To top it off, it was a jelly toy, so it the material got really gross really fast. The texture always felt greasy and it got linty.

That toy wasn’t right for me, but rabbit style toys got so much hype I bought several others, only to be disappointed again and again. If I put it inside me, the external part of the toy never lined up with my clit in a way that felt good. If I used it externally my hand would get numb from holding it in place. Nowadays, on the rare occasion that I feel like masturbating internally and externally, I use two different toys. Currently, I love a wand style toy, especially the bigger ones because I can just lean it on my clit with no hands.

Consider this story:

I have someone who bought a Lelo Ina Wave because her friend said to do that one. She was insistent she didn’t want help. . . A couple of days later she came back in pissed off. She hated it. Everything about it. Wanted to return it, but unfortunately due to our policies she couldn’t. She wanted to be angry with us, but she calmed down and admitted she was just frustrated after a divorce. After some talking, I figured out she didn’t like the fit of the rabbit. It was too stiff, and she felt like it wasn’t hitting the right spots. So we talked more and I ended up recommending the Evolved Disco Bunny. It was softer and had more flexibility. I told her I would do a one-time exchange. So she ended up getting the Evolved Bunny and another one from them. She loved it. It was exactly what she expected. -Danielle, Adult Boutique Manager

It’s ok to be disappointed in a toy or a product. The thing is not to close yourself off to trying new things. How would this customer have known she didn’t like stiff toys without trying it? How will you? There are a lot of products out there that are designed specifically to stimulate your genitals, whether it’s the clit, g-spot, or prostate. It helps to start out with a basic knowledge of your body and what you like. Maybe you decide that toys just aren’t your thing, but you can’t let one toy be the deciding factor. It helps to think of sex toys as a tool to make your sex life better. While one toy may not provide the satisfaction you’re looking for, its really all about you and your pleasure, whatever that may look like.

This post was originally published on Medium.

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